ISN’T IT IRONIC… Squid’s cold blooded, so when the temperatures in Monterey start reaching new highs—82 degrees on Monday, which was the fourth day in a row that the city sizzled under record-high heat—Squid gets grumpy. And mean.

Rolling blackouts in Squid’s neighborhood—and the loss of Squid’s precious fan—would have been the only thing that would have made Squid’s mood fouler. But as it turns out, God loves Squid.

On Monday, the CALIFORNIA INDEPENDENT SYSTEM OPERATOR issued a Stage 2 alert, asking people to reduce energy consumption until 9pm. If the alert had reached Stage 3, according to ISO, blackouts would have rolled.

In an effort to keep the lights on—or, perhaps Squid should say off—Gov. ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER called on state agencies to reduce the state’s use of electricity at peak hours by 25 percent.

And then the state went and wasted how many megawatts of electricity on those lame signs up and down the state’s highways that remind Californians—with the help of flashing lights—to FLEX YOUR POWER!

Now, Squid’s quite sure these signs aren’t solar powered. So next time we’re in a hot crunch, and it’s getting down to either Squid’s tiny, oscillating fan or a ton of big, ugly, electricity-hogging  highway signs…well, if the signs all come crashing down, don’t blame Squid.

WHO YOU CALLIN’ A BURRITO? Squid’s no rocket scientist. But Squid understands a few things about politics. And the most important rule for a politician is: Always sound like you know what you’re talking about, even if you’re not really sure. At a recent Salinas City Council meeting, councilman SERGIO SANCHEZ followed this rule brilliantly...and still came off looking like a  pendejo, or at least a little  sordo (deaf). Sanchez became visibly hot under the collar after he thought he heard JOE VIERRA, a livid anti-Measure V opponent, call all Hispanics  burros (for the  Weekly’s Spanish-impaired readers,  burro means “donkey” or “dummy”).

“I’m really getting sick of him making those racial remarks,” Sanchez commented after Vierra left the City Council chambers. “When he talks of Hispanics as  burros his speech is starting to get very annoying. He’s a racist and he hides it behind all that mumbo-jumbo talk.”

Squid squirmed when Squid heard this because as annoying as Vierra may be, he didn’t really call Hispanics  burros. In his brief and sometimes nonsensical rant, Vierra charged some councilmembers of treating local Hispanics as if they were  burros. So Sanchez’s reaction didn’t really make sense, although he did deftly manage to abide by another golden rule of politics: When in doubt, spin.