CLASSY IS AS CLASSY DOES… Squid has always wondered what politicians look for when voting for other politicians. Squid’s found Squid’s answer. This, from the LOU CALCAGNO Newsletter #3, apparently explains it all.

“I know every time I see Lou, that Carol will be there right beside him,” says Republican state Sen. ABEL MALDONADO. “The Calcagnos are classy, down-to-earth people. You can’t help but to love them.” Squid can’t argue with logic like that.  

WATCH YOUR BACK MOUNTAIN… Speaking of Calcagno, he is one busy dairyman these days. After initially agreeing to attend the May 10 LEAGUE OF WOMEN’S VOTERS OF THE SALINAS VALLEY’s candidates forum, both Calcagno and Sheriff MIKE KANALAKIS have since decided that they won’t be able to make the public forum after all. Both cited scheduling conflicts, but Squid can’t help but wonder if the thought of debating candidate JYL LUTES, a Salinas City Councilwoman, was too much for Calcagno. Conventional wisdom says she just might have schooled Big Lou on affordable housing, health care, water, transportation and the like.

While they may not have time in their busy schedules to attend a candidate’s forum, Squid will know where to find both Calcagno and Kanalakis on May 6. For $99 a head you, dear reader, can join the good ol’ boys at a RAT CAMP SHOOT OUT fundraiser to support Calcagno and Kanalakis in their reelection bids. The good times will include a .22 rifle target shoot and a tri-tip barbecue at BILL MASSA’s Quail Creek Ranch in Salinas, better known as Rat Camp. Prizes will be awarded for the top guns. No word on whether VP DICK CHENEY will make a guest appearance.

SQUID ALMOST FREAKS OUT… Sunburnt and woozy from all the marches, Squid returned to work Tuesday morning. Squid was pleased that all those immigrants who took the day off on Monday would be working again, too. But a bolt of fear struck Squid when Squid noticed that the usual site for DAY LABORERS in Seaside, in front of the 7-11 on Fremont Boulevard, was vacant.

Squid panicked. “C’mon guys!” Squid yelled out at no one in particular. “Squid is starting to freak out here. Who’s going to help Squid move Squid’s furniture now?”

Luckily for Squid, the day laborers had just moved over a little.

After receiving several complaints, Seaside city leaders met with LULAC officials and property owners at the University Plaza shopping center, and hammered out a compromise with the men, who now wait for work at the rear of the shopping center, accessible via Echo Avenue. Phew.