Thursday, June 11, 2009
Dear Gabacho: And are you still beating your wife? Loaded question aside, Mexican men have an infamous tendency for spousal abuse in the gabacho mind partly out of stereotype but also partly out of truth. Sure, Mexican men beat wives, just like gabacho, negrito, and chinito maridos. But the Department of Justice, in its latest National Crime Victimization Survey, found that “on average from 2001 to 2005, rates of intimate partner violence were similar for both Hispanic and non-Hispanic females and males.” In other words, gabachos and wabs beat their mates at similar rates. I don’t understand the glee people take in attributing societal ills to an ethnic or religious group’s essence; that’s as weak as Chicanos blaming all of Mexico’s missteps on the U.S. theft of the American Southwest so long ago.You have to stop calling gabachos gabachos, my man. That’s our word for when we’re talking about the whites when one’s within earshot. Whitey is far more familiar with us calling them gringos. If they become too familiar with gabacho we’ll have to move to the standby güero, ¿qué no? --Chicano Gordito
Dear Chubby Wab: I disagree. This column provides a public service by explaining and debunking Mexican culture to all interested parties, and what’s more important for gabachos to know than if we’re saying bad things about them in Spanish? Don’t believe the hype, gabachos: we don’t care caca about y’all, and the proof is in our respective slurs for each other. We call you gringo (white foreigner), gabacho (French idiot), güero (light-skinned), bolillo (French roll we love), and yanqui (imperialist); ustedes deride us as beaners, greasers, wet backs, aliens, wife beaters, and so many more. In the grand Rolodex of Racism, gabacho is as soft a jab as calling someone a scoundrel.