Thursday, September 20, 2012
PERCENTAGE GAME… Squid is not above admitting making a mistake, and in the case of this week’s extra-helping of moi (available every Monday in your inbox by hitting up email@example.com), Squid made one. It seems that former U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell was indeed on the Peninsula last week, but he wasn’t here to shoot a commercial. He was here to speak at a private “CEO Summit” at Spanish Bay, held by the granddaddy of all Silicon Valley venture capital firms, Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers. You know, the guys who funded such companies as Google and Amazon.com (and, probably to their chagrin, dogs like Groupon and Zynga). Powell wasn’t the only luminary in town for the uber-secret event: Former U.S. Vice President Al Gore was here, along with Microsoft founder Bill Gates and JP Morgan CEO Jamie “It’s a free. Fucking. Country” Dimon. One friend of Squid’s who was at the event reports Powell had this to say: “During this election we should all turn off our cable and network news channels, as they are mouthpieces of the respective parties.” Instead, the source says, Powell recommended, “We should read newspapers.” Squid never thought anything from the Bush administration could warm the cockles of Squid’s seven-chambered heart, but that might have well done it. Now, Mr. Secretary, how about sharing some of that six-figure speaker’s fee with the 47 percenters?
SMOKIN’ HOT… Election season holds no small measure of delight for Squid, who almost daily receives anonymous envelopes containing reams of documents that purport to prove such things as Salinas mayoral candidate Rick Phinney’s financial woes (tax liens much?); Salinas council candidate José Castañeda’s legal woes (the entire universe knows he pleaded no contest to that false affidavit, so save the postage); Supervisor candidate Marc Del Piero’s secret worship of Mitt Romney (there’s allegedly a tramp-stamp tattoo to prove it); and claims that Supervisor Dave Potter might have once punched a kitten (although that picture was really too blurry to tell). Squid jokes about those last two, but still finds it heartwarming when a would-be pol is caught doing something right. Earlier this week, Squid was district-walking with Castañeda when they came upon a group of skater kids at Constitution Park. Castañeda needed helpers to post signs, and judging by the bong and amount of pot wafting through the air, the kids were going to need cash for Doritos. “Hey guys, lay off the drugs,” Casteñeda told the kids. “Now who wants to make some money?” It turned into a win-win: Castañeda got his signs posted, the volunteers got $10 an hour and, hopefully, the kids learned a lesson on how to better hide their dope.