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As Ben Franklin allegedly said, "Beer is proof God wants us to be happy."

Your beer haikus provide proof that ol Benny was right.

Our informal contest for two VIP tickets to tomorrow's Monterey Beer Festival at Monterey County Fairgrounds netted dozens of responses, and evidence you local beer poets are funny mofos. In other words, thank you for cracking me up. For fomenting foamy funnies. For pouring on the sudsy smiles.

I mean, how can you not love a declarative poem that reps the rules of haiku, then promptly bonks them? Dreamwalker JB gave us precisely that, with a 5-7-6:

Haiku never rhymes
Syllables - five, seven, five
Beer is a poet's friend

Then he added this:

Beer Haiku Contest:
Monterey Beer Festival
Tickets please, mine's best.

Fortunately it got better. Here's the best of the beer haikus 2012, in ascending order...

6th place • underoni

Another beer now
We'll make toast to tomorrow
Or drown my sorrow

5th place • schmoops

These be hopped-up days
Everywhere IPAs
Three beers in, oops, drunk

4th place • Tiffunnygrl

Pay no Bills, Post No.
Bail me out of the jail, Please.
First stop- Sand City.

3rd place • Kelly Musca

Bunnies, frogs, kangas
Some cold fresh ones from the fridge
Hops, hops, hops all day

runner up • Valerie Brower

beer, beer, everywhere
it's my party, i don't care
bong if i want to

1st place • drsweetsauce

Chilled beer in our mugs,
Look, the heads so full and thick,
Let's toast for hair plugs!